But I Wipe My Own Ass

This is a more personal post- feel free to skip it! But I feel the need to write about it to help anyone else who is going through something similar. I was told that less than 3% of Guillain Barré patients loose control of their bowels... And you guessed it, I was among that lucky 3%.

I have read in the past few weeks that loosing control of your bowels is all part of the AMSAN Variant of GBS which I have. Severe pain is also part of AMSAN. I thought that every person with GBS had the same agonizing pain that I had. Where you skin feels on fire and you can't figure out where it's coming from.

AMSAN- Accute Motor Sencory Axonal Nuropathy is the most severe variant of GBS and not much is known about it.

When your 26 years old and you have never had health problems you think you invencable in some ways... I never thought that I would go from having a sinus and ear infection to not having any contol of my body within hours. I was mortified when they said they were putting in a cathater and to make the entire situation even better, Aunt Flow was visiting... So you can imagine my horror.

Oh the embarrassment kept on coming. It seemed like every. single. time. a nurse or CNA came in my room they would ask "have you (or has she) pooped today?" I so badly wanted to tell them to mind their own business... When I was finally able to talk after 2 months, my family quickly learned that that question was off limits to ask me.

I remember doing my sign for "sorry" every time I had to be changed. Most of the time whoever had that job would tell me not to worry about it and that was their  job... None the less, I was 26 years old and it's hard to except that someone has to change you or having to wear a diaper.

On the less than fun times I needed help going number two with an enema... I would save my Dilauded IV until right before... No fun at all...

When I finally got some return and was able to move some they finally removed my cathater... But then I had to retrain my bladder... Let me tell you, I have a whole new respect for kids who are being potty trained... It's not easy, even being an adult.

As of a year today, I have been able to wipe my own ass... And that's an amazing feeling lol! I'm so greatfull that all of that is behind me!

So if you have GBS and have problems with your bowels, you are not alone. I know how hard it is to accept help with personal care and things that were once so simple.